By ALLISON LORD – Caribbean
I can see it now, Tiger Woods ringing Jesse James’ doorbell. Jesse opens the door, Tiger stands there with a big smile on his face, hands Jesse a helium balloon and a big card attached that reads simply, ‘You just saved my ass. ‘Here’s the torch Jesse, thank you.’
Yes people, as we all know, actress Sandra Bullock got blind sided by the actions of her cheating, disrespectful husband, Jesse James. Sadly, Sandra had blinders on, looking straight ahead because she so trusted her husband. The other jackass in this story, Tiger Woods, shot a tee right between the eyes of his wife Elin, who by the way, is also the mother of his two kids. Umhmmm! Nasty.
One can only imagine the many more men, celebrity and non-celebrity, who are shaking in their boots, terrified about their extra marital affairs. Those who are not in the public eye are thankful, but I can assure you, they are all going through their own living hell right now.
The sad thing about it all is the media jokers who take pleasure in blasting these sordid affairs all over the air waves under the guise of ‘the public has the right to know the facts,’ ‘it’s all in reporting the facts,’ zoot, zoot, zoot.
My question is, facts from whose perspective? Who are their legit sources? Who really wants to know?
What’s even sadder is when they really want to juice it up, knowing that their report is mostly untrue and full of bull, they tag on the word ‘allegedly’ every fifteen seconds, enabling them to sell a pack of lies to a public that feeds on gossip and people’s misfortune. As they continue with the charade of ‘reporting the news,’ these media jokers further exploit the women affected by their husbands’ affairs, by pretending to empathize with the raw emotion they obviously are feeling.
If you take a good look at the reporters – male or female – delivering news of the infidelity scandals, you will no doubt notice their affected expressions when they dive into the stories. As they talk out of both corners of their mouths, they try to blame every one but themselves for the pain and suffering caused to the ‘sweet’ human beings they skewer over the coals at every news broadcast, day in and day out. If those despicable reporters would only close the door to the bedroom of all the couples going through their turmoil and let them deal with those matters in private!
But no, members of the media rush to get low class individuals, aka “the cheaters” on their shows. They make sure celebrity ambulance-chasing attorneys are standing by their call-girl clients who can give them the scoop, as they shed crocodile tears in what looks like rehearsed remorse. I can virtually hear the “CH-CHING, sound of a cash machine, with every fake tear that rolls down the dirty cheeks of these home wreckers – all in return for a prolonged fifteen minutes of fame and a few tabloid dollars that promise a life in the easy lane.
Years ago people used to feel embarrassed by scandals of infidelity. The “other” man or woman who encroached on the marriage or relationship would be hiding in shame. Not anymore. With unprincipled attorneys pulling money under the table from guilt-ridden parties, in exchange for silence from their clients, and with the media glorifying these scandals 24/7, it is a feather in the cap to have an affair and more feathers if it is with a celebrity. That’s big bucks these days.
Have we become so hardened and callous that we have forgotten the victims are human beings who do have hearts? Does the human suffering mean nothing to anyone anymore?
My heart bleeds for the fun loving Sandra Bullock, America’s Sweetheart. At a time when she should be in the spotlight basking in the afterglow of her Oscar win, she is in hiding, utterly humiliated by the awkward circumstance in which her husband, Jesse James has placed her. Her image is plastered all over the world in a disgusting situation that evokes unwelcomed pity. And for a strong, vibrant, proud, confident loving woman as Sandra Bullock, this is truly unfortunate, for she did not sign up for any of it. To our knowledge, she has done nothing wrong, yet every word she’s uttered in the past on love, marriage, relationships, and fidelity has been unearthed, dissected, discussed and broadcast relentlessly.
If Jesse, who is ‘not all that’ can betray someone like Sandra, who completely trusted him, then who can anyone trust?
Unfortunately, there are many more of the Jesse James and Tiger Woods types out there. No doubt they’re nervous; but by the time the next few are ‘outed’ by a scorned, fame-seeking or money hungry lover, and Jesse is ready to pass on the philanderer torch, this kind of behavior will probably be the norm and no longer have a stigma attached. What a sad commentary on where we as a society are headed!
The whole bloody lot are sick, adulation seeking douchebags.
Hilarious and well said, Allison!
I came on here through Donny’s link. You may not remember me from Tomorrow’s Stars Today…regardless, it’s cool to see your blog!
Speak English Andromeda1111. What does this pero de que son bull**** mean.
Here is the translation:
That they are philanderes… that’s what they are.
philander = mujeriego
I can’t believe this is causing so much commotion. Get over these people’s lives that have nothing to do with your own, and start looking at what is ACTUALLY important.
Explain to me how Sandra Bullock’s marriage is going to have an impact on your life. From what I know, it will have none.
Great blog. Enjoying the reading ladies.
The show Cheaters missed these scoops!
what can i say that hasn’t been said about jesse and sandra and tiger and elin and all those bozos. nuthin.
It is true that the celebrities the media will put more of what was.
Pero de que son… mujeriegos son.
Men are unconscious, are married and are looking for women
SOME men NOT ALL men!!
Sandra, ask anybody about me and they will tell you that I am a good guy and I am available. Email me. Lose that loser
As a man I do not really feel sorry for Sandra, I think she knew what kind of possum Jesse was. I feel sorry for her for the way the media has crucified her all in the name of reporting. I think your article is dead on, I wish you had written more as I could not stop reading, it was very interesting. I like your blog. Keep up the good work sisters. I will be back.
My husband knew before we started dating how I felt about cheaters, so when we got married it was set in stone so when he cheated on me all he did was come home pack his bags and split. That was the end of that. I wonder if Sandra Bullock set any boundaries for Jesse before they got married, knowing what kind of person he was.
Did Gloria Allred’s husband leave her another women? She looks as though she has a vengeance against men.
Those ambulance chasing attorneys you spoke of in your article sounds like Gloria Allred, why didn’t you just call her out. She is a scum bag and a th…t.
Someone needs to uncover something about Gloria Allred so she can be quiet for a while.
Gloria Allred, Joy Baher, Nancy Grace, Jane Velez Mitchell, etc. should all be in the media jerks column.
Beautiful Caribbean queens. Are you and and your sister twins? Are you guys married? Keep the blog going. Caricatures are the bomb. You rock!
WTH!!! Dumbbbbbb Jesse!
A whore totting woman feels slighted by the way the married man Tiger Woods told the whole world that he loves his wife. I wonder how she felt about the other married men she slept with, who had no fame and fortune who used her services then went back to their innocent unsuspecting wives (at home) waiting for their filthy husbands to come home to spread her disease. As for Jesse James I wonder what diseases he has rummaging through those dirty garbage bins. I hope they treat him for it in rehab.
Caricatures are great. Frame them. pack them. Send to the Jerky Boys pronto.
Jesus died for us. Tiger, what has Budhha done for you? Jesse what has Hitler done for you? Jesus is the way to your redemption. The ultimate true love. The ultimate sacrifice. Have an affair with him. Happy Easter. Be blessed.
Happy Easter All.
Wish everyone peace.
Sex addiction is the new get out of jail free card and both Jesse and Tiger are playing big time. No more needs to be said about that. We all know it. Case closed.
Sandra must be feeling like an effin’ fool after giving her “expert opinion” on what Elin should’ve done with Tiger.
That’s what happens when you’re too engaged in others lives and not watching your own….THAT GOES FOR EVERYONE HERE WITH THEIR SELF RIGHTEOUS COMMENTS. Elin and Sandra have some advice for all of you – before you talk about the speck in Tiger and Jesse’s eyes, take the plank out of your own.”
Look how happy Halle is right now. Eric Benet who? There’s life beyond this humiliation Sandra.
I’m on the ‘Sandra divorce the loser and get on with your life’ bandwagon. Same for Elin. Get a clue from HALLE BERRY and wash your hands off of these losers.
Came across this comment elsewhere and thought you ladies at My Candid Opinion (and your readers) would appreciate it. Pretty funny.
‘Jessie James is being treated for “Testicularis Stupidosis” : PDR -”An uncommon condition contracted by men who have beautifully attractive, rich wives who then experience a compulsion to pursue, wallow and rut with trashy females.” Condition can be very difficult and costly to treat especially when parasites appear in the local environment in the form of trashy women or lawyers which exacerbate the condition. Usually divorce is resulting symptom accompanied by significant financial drain of the sufferer and public humiliation. Radical treatments have been attempted such as severe and brutal beatings, public humiliations and loss of commercial endorsements. Murder has been known to occur in the most extreme cases.’
The media should just leave these people alone to heal and work it out.
Opposites attract? Trash is trash. Class is class.
Gloria Allgreed? That’s a good one. I agree with you that this new one with the old lady pushed the envelope. The teacher says “I don’t believe it happened,” but she doesn’t say emphatically “It didn’t happen” which means she cannot prove it didn’t happen. I guess everyone is looking for their 15 minutes of fame.
Don’t like Tiger one bit, but how can his teacher say he’s lying about his experience as a child? She wasn’t there. Even an old broad is trying to cash in on Tiger’s troubles. Oh, but what am I thinking, her attorney is Gloria Allgreed.
Jesse looks like Glenn Beck.
No woman steals another woman’s husband or man, idiot. Let’s get that clear. Men stray because they want to stray. Did you hear anything about a gun being put to Tiger or Jesse’s head to have sex with these women? I didn’t think so.
Talking from experience dumbo? Some men have no intention to cheat but can be tempted to do so. Obviously that’s not your excuse.
The reality is women (and men) often find that they have so many other reasons to stay with a cheating spouse that they often don’t leave the first time they find out (even if it was a bunch of women). Clinton? Other politicians? Marriage is not just about sex for many people. How many people do you know that left after the first time they found out their spouse was cheating? How many stayed–at least for a while?
Everyone seems to think it is a simple decision to leave… and logically it should be…. But the way human beings are built emotionally, for most people it is not as simple as flipping a switch and saying “goodbye, it’s over.”
You may think it would be that simple… but there is usually far more emotional entwinement and there’s a lot more to it than just the sex component. I think it is good to give Sandra Bullock (and Elin) the space to do what is right for her. And what that is, we shall see.
Can’t Sandra and Elin sue these trollops for alienation of affection? I think there are laws that allow the wife to sue the mistresses for stealing their husbands.
Am I the only one who’s sick and tired of GLORIA ALLRED? Before any celebrity misstep hits the news she’s right there circling to get a good feeding from the carcass. What a sad excuse for an attorney. She should be your next media jerk.
Gloria Allred is the lowest of the low. She says she fights for the rights of women, but have you ever seen her take a case that does not involve a celebrity, $ and the media?
I am so over hearing all this BS about sex addiction. They cheat like so called macho men and cry like freakin babies..boo hoo frickity hoo…Sex addict my a**. Its called self control and self respect.
Even if it is for bad behavior, these cheaters love to make the headlines. When you are in the public eye and you cheat it is obvious you want to get caught. In my opinion it is the “redemption process” that these a-holes look forward to. They misbehave, and still in the public eye, they keep a celebrity status since every TV channel we tune on or every magazine we browse through talks about them… Sickening! Then, the redemption process starts where these jerks go into some type of rehab, like sexual rehab, where I guess they tie their penises to their pants and bow to never again lay with nobody else other than their spouses. They come out of the rehab as “born again monogamist” with a halo shining up their behinds and end up as public speakers against infidelity at your nearest high school.
Well, I called it here first. Three days ago I said Jesse the coward was going to blame sex addition and sign up for rehab. Now everybody is saying it. I should be writing for this blog.
I like your poem Jamie Soxx, but there are some very different words I would have for Jesse, but I know I can’t write here. I can only call Jesse and Tiger scum and worse scum.
There was a man named Jesse
Who like just too much p**sy
He cheated on his wife
Back stabbed her with a knife
And now he’s going looney.
lol.
Can I be a blogger too. Luv it. I think a male spanish will be great for you.
they’re both dumb and dumber. lol.
Dumb and Dumberrrrr. I wonder which one is dumb and which is dumber?
Clearly those low life losers did not have role models in their lives OR they did not see the men in their lives do right by their mothers OR the mothers have to be blamed for their indiscretions. Either way they are scum. I love my wife and I respect her even more. Lack of respect for themselves and their wives is key. I say dump all those losers.
Thank you for this blog. Some of the comments are dead on but all are interesting. Keep up the good work.
Jesse, Tiger, Eric Benet, David Letterman, David Duchovny and the band of other ‘alleged’
philanderers give love, marriage and men a bad name. They should all be taken to a deserted island and let’s see how much of a sexual addiction they really have. Cop out little boys trying to be men.
My prayers go out to Sandra and Elin.
Mucho Gracias My Canddid opinion I love your blog. We needed it a long time ago. Love the opinions.
Why are we so down on Jesse James, Tiger Woods, John Edwards, David Letterman, David Duchovny, and Eric Bennet. What do they all have in common? I envy them. Those are the bad boys who love to embarrass good women, their wives, women love. I wish one of them would write a book to tell us guys how to do what they do. Hey, I want to get my five minute of fame, too.
If women would choose not have affairs with married men, I wonder who those men would cheat with. Oh, no! Can you picture this, Tiger and Jesse, ha! Now thats a Kodak picture. If you cant get a woman take a man.
Warning to all celebrities – DO NOT BOAST ABOUT YOUR HUSBAND OR RELATIONSHIP to the press. I’m sure Sandra is feeling stupid and regretting it right now, but she can take consolation that Jesse is the most hated man in America right now. Her sincere words just show the world how much of a scumbag Jesee is.We despise that arrogant bastard. F*ing idiot. Bozo. Fugly Ass&%$#. Tiger is no exception. Dweeb. STD scavenger. Bow legged bullfrog. Dumb and Dumber.
she’s america’s sweetheart and all but sandra could be a cold fish. can u blame a man then? nobody knows what the real story is.
how much u think a picture of sandra is worth right now? i bet millions. better get my camera out and go to the hollywood hills.
I’m hearing a rumor that Sandra may go to rehab counseling with Jesse. I hope it’s one of those April Fool’s tricks. I hope she doesn’t go back to him.
What’s the deal with this Dr. Drew? He keeps talking about celebrities and their so called sex addiction when he is not treating them. Who is he to tell Sandra Bullock she is addicted to Jesse and should divorce him to save herself? Isn’t there some law against that?
As an artist I can appreciate your caricatures. They are funny and make your blog fun to read. I really like this one. Great job.
sandra, come to me, baby. treat u like a queen.
Jesse and Sandra are back together. they are going for counseling and want to have a baby. Tiger just announced he’s off women and has been sending lots of texts to Ricky Martin. Just kiddin y’all. April fools. lol.
I hope Sandra and Elin get fumigated from those flea infested dogs.
he looks like one of those skinheads to me with the hair and beard as a disguise. yuck.
As if it couldn’t get any worse, Jesse posed for pictures in Nazi hat and giving the Hitler salute? Here is a man who has displayed stupidity of magnitude proportions and should be shunned for that alone. Idiot.
sex addiction is the new cool. i wonder if it will work for me.
I just read in an earlier post on this blog where someone said they found it strange Jesse had not yet claimed “sexual addiction.” Well, he did today. Is anyone surprised? That’s the new “my dog ate my homework” excuse for cheaters caught with their pants down.
Rihanna laughed at Britney Spears at the American Music Awards during Britney’s dark days, but RiRi did not know that soon she herself would be splashed all over the tabloids in her own scandal. Same for Sandra who talked about Elin Nordegren, Tiger’s wife. No one knows when they could be tabloid fodder. That’s why we have to be compassionate towards people who are going through difficult times especially those in the spotlight.
I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this article and cartoon. You hit a home run with this one Allison. Yessiree, the only winner here is Tiger Woods. Jesse is taking the heat off of him and for that Tiger owes him big time! One more check to write, Tiger. lol.
Ah the power of reality TV. Sandra’s Oscar has taken a backseat to a scandal in which she is neither the writer, director, producer or actor, but she’s definitely the biggest reality star in the highest rated unscripted drama the year. And we thought reality tv was on its way out????
Jesse should have kept his “monster” in his garage. Tiger should have stuck to “putting” his clubs on the course not in ter course.
Jesse James is taking a beating which he deserves because he is after all a married man, but most of you here are being a bit unfair. Sandra Bullock knew who and what she was getting involved with when she decided to date and marry this man. When you are covered up in tatoos like that, when you are married to a porn star, etc., your tastes are not going to change overnight. There had to have been signs but most women choose to conveniently not see the writing on the wall. I’m sure now when she thinks about it all the dots will connect. Believe me, I’ve been there.
Why do women think that they can change men. Note to all women out there, take example from this situation. Once a cheater, always a cheater. No exceptions. And one more thing, you cannot change a man especially after marriage.
I didn’t get it when I heard they were dating and was even more shocked when I heard she was marrying him. It was an odd fit – she classy woman and him, well a dirtbag. Looks like I was right. What an idiot!
What I keep hearing in my head that makes me really really hurt for Sandra Bullock is that in almost every interview she would rave about this pig saying that this is the only person who had her back. She really believed that, but what a knife that was placed in it. Jesse makes all us men look bad.
Family, friends, someone, anyone, , please pull Gloria Allred aside and tell her that she is sickening just like the ugly b… Nancy Grace. Gloria I have had enough of you, do us all a favor stay off TV.
It is with great shame that I have the same name as that low life scum attorney Gloria. I used to have such respect for her in the past but now I see, she is the same trash as her trashy clients. Gloria we are sick of seeing your ugly ass face all over the place. Chill and act your age.
Sandra knew that Jesse was a piece of shit before she married him. Sometimes we see nice ladies and think they are all that but most of them like the low life scum of bad boys. Having said that the media is scum just like them. Remember the guy who used to be on Insider and had to go to rehab? I cannot recall him telling the world that he was a drunk nor any of his cohorts reporting that to us. What’s his name again?
Ba-Bye Jesse. Time to go. Sandra, stay strong.
Hey, Jesse was a lowdown dirty scoundrel when Sandra met him and she should not be surprised. She married a bad boy and that’s what you get. Sorry Sandra. I’m a fan but as we all know most times a leopard can’t change it’s spots.
Allison I must say you were spot on with your article. The only thing you did not talk about was your thought to a pending divorce for Sandra and Jesse and now it is splattered all over the net. Did you think it was going to head that way?
Divorce is not the answer. They should work it out especially for the kid. The media needs to butt out.
I don’t believe in divorce, but how can you trust someone after such a betrayal and public humiliation.
Sandra filed for divorce. Best news I’ve heard all day. I would give her another Academy award just for that.
Just another two dickheads who think with their penises instead of their brains.
I heard a cop pulled Jesse over and he let him go because Jesse was crying about his troubles. Would that happen to any of us? HELL NO!!! What a scheming cheating manipulator!
If paparazzi trash like TMZ, Showbiz Tonight, Extra, and The Insider etc. would leave people like Sandra and Jesse and Tiger and Elin alone, their marriages would stand a better chance. Celebrities should all boycott those half ass shows. None is better than the other.
Am I the only one that finds it funny that Jesse hasn’t signed up for sex rehab like Tiger and all those cheating bastards who go after the flea infested alley cats while their beautiful trusting wives stay at home? It’s coming. Just you wait.
I see some of the ambulance chasing attorneys you are talking about on TV everyday. That kind of ‘legal’ blackmail against celebrities and prostitution of women should be outlawed.
FUNNY FUNNY FUNNY. Cartoon is hilarious.
Tiger is scum.
Jesse is worse scum.
You are the best!
Yes she is! Great article!
Sandra Bullock is America’s sweetheart and she will get over that loser. This too shall pass.