By ALLISON LORD – Caribbean
I can see it now, Tiger Woods ringing Jesse James’ doorbell. Jesse opens the door, Tiger stands there with a big smile on his face, hands Jesse a helium balloon and a big card attached that reads simply, ‘You just saved my ass. ‘Here’s the torch Jesse, thank you.’
Yes people, as we all know, actress Sandra Bullock got blind sided by the actions of her cheating, disrespectful husband, Jesse James. Sadly, Sandra had blinders on, looking straight ahead because she so trusted her husband. The other jackass in this story, Tiger Woods, shot a tee right between the eyes of his wife Elin, who by the way, is also the mother of his two kids. Umhmmm! Nasty.
One can only imagine the many more men, celebrity and non-celebrity, who are shaking in their boots, terrified about their extra marital affairs. Those who are not in the public eye are thankful, but I can assure you, they are all going through their own living hell right now.
The sad thing about it all is the media jokers who take pleasure in blasting these sordid affairs all over the air waves under the guise of ‘the public has the right to know the facts,’ ‘it’s all in reporting the facts,’ zoot, zoot, zoot.
My question is, facts from whose perspective? Who are their legit sources? Who really wants to know?
What’s even sadder is when they really want to juice it up, knowing that their report is mostly untrue and full of bull, they tag on the word ‘allegedly’ every fifteen seconds, enabling them to sell a pack of lies to a public that feeds on gossip and people’s misfortune. As they continue with the charade of ‘reporting the news,’ these media jokers further exploit the women affected by their husbands’ affairs, by pretending to empathize with the raw emotion they obviously are feeling.
If you take a good look at the reporters – male or female – delivering news of the infidelity scandals, you will no doubt notice their affected expressions when they dive into the stories. As they talk out of both corners of their mouths, they try to blame every one but themselves for the pain and suffering caused to the ‘sweet’ human beings they skewer over the coals at every news broadcast, day in and day out. If those despicable reporters would only close the door to the bedroom of all the couples going through their turmoil and let them deal with those matters in private!
But no, members of the media rush to get low class individuals, aka “the cheaters” on their shows. They make sure celebrity ambulance-chasing attorneys are standing by their call-girl clients who can give them the scoop, as they shed crocodile tears in what looks like rehearsed remorse. I can virtually hear the “CH-CHING, sound of a cash machine, with every fake tear that rolls down the dirty cheeks of these home wreckers – all in return for a prolonged fifteen minutes of fame and a few tabloid dollars that promise a life in the easy lane.
Years ago people used to feel embarrassed by scandals of infidelity. The “other” man or woman who encroached on the marriage or relationship would be hiding in shame. Not anymore. With unprincipled attorneys pulling money under the table from guilt-ridden parties, in exchange for silence from their clients, and with the media glorifying these scandals 24/7, it is a feather in the cap to have an affair and more feathers if it is with a celebrity. That’s big bucks these days.
Have we become so hardened and callous that we have forgotten the victims are human beings who do have hearts? Does the human suffering mean nothing to anyone anymore?
My heart bleeds for the fun loving Sandra Bullock, America’s Sweetheart. At a time when she should be in the spotlight basking in the afterglow of her Oscar win, she is in hiding, utterly humiliated by the awkward circumstance in which her husband, Jesse James has placed her. Her image is plastered all over the world in a disgusting situation that evokes unwelcomed pity. And for a strong, vibrant, proud, confident loving woman as Sandra Bullock, this is truly unfortunate, for she did not sign up for any of it. To our knowledge, she has done nothing wrong, yet every word she’s uttered in the past on love, marriage, relationships, and fidelity has been unearthed, dissected, discussed and broadcast relentlessly.
If Jesse, who is ‘not all that’ can betray someone like Sandra, who completely trusted him, then who can anyone trust?
Unfortunately, there are many more of the Jesse James and Tiger Woods types out there. No doubt they’re nervous; but by the time the next few are ‘outed’ by a scorned, fame-seeking or money hungry lover, and Jesse is ready to pass on the philanderer torch, this kind of behavior will probably be the norm and no longer have a stigma attached. What a sad commentary on where we as a society are headed!
Larry is a dirty old man. No better than Tiger or Jesse or Edwards or any of the other male dogs out there.
sleeping with your wife’s sister is NEVER cool. Pervert.
Has anybody noticed that Larry King is continuing to interivew people like nothing skanky is going on in his life.
Yes, Tiger looks more relaxed. Do you think he and Elin will stay together. Tiger looks like he is changing and that’s all anybody can ask for right?
Saw Sandra Bullock on TV and the girl looks fantastic. no one would know she has gone trhough such a trial. She didn’t have her wedding ring on so that must spell divorce and that is the best thing that she could ever do for herself.
Kathy Griffin is really doing a live televised pap smear? I didn’t hear that but it’s more than gross. wonder if the carpet match the drapes. lol.
shawn is dirtyer for being with larry.
i like kathy griffin. she’s funny and doesn’t mean anything bad. lighten up guys.
Shawn King’s boyfriend is a dirty dirty dog.
those tabloid reporters are the worse. niecy nash on the insider always gives an award like she’s little miss perfect. when her scandal comes around with her so called boyfriend and louie her gay dancing partner i’m sure she will run to a corner and hide. the ohter one, lara spencer too.
Rhyming Joker you are funny. Like your poem about Larry King.
When did this topic turn from Jerk Jesse James and Turd Tiger Woods to Shameful Shawn and Lecherous Larry King?
If this is a prank by Shawn and Larry King I can tell you they got more than they bargained for. They’re all over the news and not in a nice way.
Kathy Griffin is a nasty skank who will do anything to be in the spotlight. As far as I’m concerned she’s on the Z list. Go wash yourself Kathy.
Tiger seems to be a better person from the scandal. He looks refreshed and more at ease like a burden has been lifted from his shoulders.
To Hmmm I agree with you about those tabloid reporters. It’s only a matter of time before their own scandal breaks. Remember Larry King.
Sandra Bullock has taken off her wedding ring. Whoo Hoo!! Now THAT’S a positive move in the right direction. As for Shawn and Larry King, I think it’s a publicity stunt. It seems like people are going nuts and selling their souls to be in the limelight or to stay there. Kathy Griffin is now having her pap smear taped and aired on the internet. GROSS!
. I could vomit. Talk about life on the D-List. That’s life on the NAAAAAASTY NAAAAAASTY desperate ugly slut list. Spare us Kathy and put a bag over your head and under your skirt too. You don’t need to show us what you caught over the years. Ugghhhh!
That self-righteous woman on the Insider who used to be on Dancing with the Stars – wonder what she’ll do when her infidelity scandal breaks. I’m sick and tired of all of them pretending their marriages are perfect while they pass judgment on everybody else.
what was shawn king thinking? didn’t she know that this Latino baseball actor wanna be guy would come out at some point and spill the beans? when will these people learn. is stupidity a criteria for celebrity status? it would certainly seem so.
All, and I mean ALL of these people should get divorced and be forced to wear a Scarlett Letter or a card saying “I’m contaminated, dirty, sleasy and gross and don’t deserve a good mate or spouse.”
Shawn King does not seem to be so innocent. A new cad has joined the group of s**** & tell – the Latino guy saying he had an affair with Shawn King. Is this circus never going to end.
When someone marrys someone who has been married and divorced 7 times before…they are not the brightest pea in the pod. Hello, Shawn King.
People are going crazy on this blog. I was under the impression that this article was about Jesse James and Tiger Woods. Now y’all are talking about every cheating scandal under the sun. I guess that’s alright with all that’s going on right now. Great job Allison. Your blog is certainly a success.
It’s really sad when people laugh at Larry King and ridicule him because of his age. It’s not nice. Have you ever thought that you are heading toward his age with every day that goes by? How would you like to be teased the way you tease him? So, he’s 70 something. That’s not even old these days. But to laugh at him because he’s lived so long is despicable. He’s a human being and thank God he can still enjoy life and yes, have sex with his wife and even create children. I sense more than a tinge of jealousy here.
Larry King and Shawn King. Boring. Yawn!! Shawn just has to bide her time with the old geezer.
I can hardly keep up with all the cheating scandals. Every day seems to bring on a new mess. I agree with Kurt R. We are a nation in some serious trouble.
Adultery is bad in itself. Cheating is bad in itself, but shtupping your wife’s sister is the LOWEST of the low. None of these ‘boys’ in men’s clothing have any right saying ANYTHING about Tiger or Jesse. Every single one of them is playing righteous until they get caught. Unfortunately, none of them seem to be embarrassed.
Shawn King deserves every penny she can get for every minute of her gold digging efforts and having to put up with that egomaniac Larry.
It’s almost as if it’s a feather in the cap to be caught cheating these days. I agree with Kurt R. We have clearly lost our moral compass as a nation. I shudder to think of the future.
Even the homosexuals that desperately wanted to get married are now breaking up. I’m sure they’re now happy that they were not “legally” married so they can avoid those nasty equal property distributions. Talk about wanting your cake and eating it too.
We as a nation have to seriously review our position on marriage. We have degenerated into a country lacking morals and the basic human decency that this country was built on. The troubling thing is such behavior is becoming more and more acceptable with each with each new incident. Unfortunately, I don’t think we’ve seen the end of this pattern of behavior.
Does Jesse now pass the torch to Larry King? lol
If Larry was having an affair with his wife’s sister I can’t believe he talked about Jesse and Tiger all this time with a straight face. For his sake, I hope it’s not true. I would never watch his show again.
I wonder if Gloria Allred is going to represent Shawn King against Larry.
There are so many jokes with Larry King now being in the cheating limelight, but I don’t dare go there. LOL!
Think Larry will blame sex addiction too?
As much as I wish this would all go away, I enjoyed reading your take on the Jesse/Tiger scandals. At least it was different. I like the caricature too.
Larry King
Was criticizing
Jesse and Tiger
Now who’s the liar
Allegedly, allegedly
He committed adultery
Allegedly, allegedly
He’s double dippin in the family
Allegedly, allegedly
His Twitter name Kings things
Does not include siblings
Nasty nasty nasty
Allegedly, allegedly
I can’t wait to hear about more reporters getting caught in scandals themselves. Hypocrites!!!
Jesse seems to have disappeared off the face of the earth. He must be begging them to keep him in sex rehab for as long as possible so he won’t have to face the public any time soon. I hope Sandra is healing.
Elin is moving back to Sweden? That’s what I hear. I hope she does and gets a nice man who will appreciate her. I would be willing to fill in Tiger’s shoes. Hey, they don’t call me ‘Lion’ for nothin.
I don’t think Larry and Shawn will actually get divorced. I heard its a publicity stunt. Larry’s numbers on CNN are down by about 43% and apparently they’re hoping this ‘scandal’ brings in viewers. If that’s true, then it’s pretty sad that a man of his stature has to stoop so low. To me he’s the king of all talk. He doesn’t have to do this.
This is starting to be a bloody joke with Larry King now entering the scenario.
Larry has been married 8 times. I think he did really well with this last wife. Maybe there’s hope for them yet.
Let’s not forget that Charlie Sheen is allegedly back at it again. But in this instance, if it’s true, is anyone surprised?
Imagine Larry King is accused of the same thing he and his many panels have been discussing on Tiger and Jesse and others. As you say in your article, Allison, “One can only imagine the many more men, celebrity and non-celebrity, who are shaking in their boots, terrified about their extra marital affairs.” Who’s next, I wonder. This whole thing sucks big time.
Fox has a new show coming out “The Real Scumbag Husbands of America.” Guess who’s starring. Network execs can’t decide between the obvious ones, Tiger, Jesse, Edwards, Letterman, Kobe, so they’re seeking the advice of NBC executives. LOL! Ain’t that a b***h!!
I would love to be a fly on the wall for Tiger and Jesse’s sex rehab sessions. This is entertaining stuff. YES, I do have a life, thank you.
I’ve been reading these comments and nobody talks about the women that cheat. 50% of women cheat, including some famous celebrities. Give the guys a break cuz they’re only doing what they know best.
Any news on Jesse? Glad Tiger has given Sandra a break in the media though.
Men have cheated since the beginning of time. It’s not going to change any time soon so get over it and wake up and smell the tatoos. The signs are ALWAYS there ladies. Always.
Just found this blog and I love it. I read every single article and saved this one for last. Love the illustrations of Jesse and Tiger. Keep up the good work ladies.
What’s next for Tiger now that he’s lost the Masters? I hope he focuses on therapy for his so called addictions and spend the rest of the time making up to his wife. He should give Kobe Bryant a call pronto.
Sandra Bullock is going on George Lopez show in November to give him the scoop. They’re good friends. By then the whole thing will probably be old and somebody else will be in the cheating spotlight. We can bet on that, but we I don’t want to wait till November. Do you? In the meantime, I do hope she divorces him.
What happened to that little old lady who tried to get in the limelight with Tiger? The teacher. Those 15 minutes came and went really fast. Wish the same could happen for Gloria Allred. By the way, I really like this blog. This is my second or third post.
Can you imagine if that creep Tiger had won the masters? Then he would feel that he could do anything and still prevail and would probably not learn anything from his infidelity. Losing was the best thing that could have happened to Tiger. It’s a good place to start rebuilding all areas of his life.
Phil Mickelson is 1000 times the man Tiger or Jesse could ever be. Head and shoulders a Master above those creeps.
I’m so glad Phil Mickelson won the Masters and left Tiger in the dust. Here’s a gentleman who has shown love and support to his cancer-stricken wife (unlike that other dog, Edwards). What a special special gift to his wife and mother. Congratulations Phil Mickelson. Well deserved.
Some Men are never satisfied with anything, and if they have money they are worse.As has a chance forget their commitment
Tiger lost big time. So what now? Boo hoo.
That doofus Jim Carrey on a rampage against women since his breakup with Jenny McCarty. He tweeted Elin was a willing participant in Tiger’s infidelity. Low, low, low.
I just don’t understand why these guys get married. No one would care what they do if they didn’t. Think Wilt Chamberlain.
most men keep searching because they are too blind and stupid to see the special woman right in front of them.
A famous actor once said, ‘why go out for hamburger when you have filet mignon at home’. Hal and Dixie obviously enjoyed their meals together and didn’t feel a need to look elsewhere. That is precious. Most of us wish we could find that contentment in our lives before we die and maybe that’s why we keep searching.
I was about to say that Tiger’s father would turn over in his grave at the scandal, then I remembered…that’s where Tiger earned his philandering stripes…allegedly.
Yes. Dixie and Hal’s relationship did not get much media attention but they were a good example. I guess good news does not sell.
What disgusts me (or make me sad) is our moral value became “negotiable.”
No matter what, LYING is bad.
If Tiger felt “caged,” he should have talked his wife. Maybe he is not made for monogamy. He should have never married, or maybe it is a “tiger gone wild” phase for this unstoppable athlete. Cheating is the lowest … lying to a person whom once you called a “partner for life”?
To increase sales or rating of your products, it became OK to exagerate or fabricate the facts. Fact is not something you can play with. Call it “Opinion” instead!
But can we keep everyone’s privacy private for now and focus on PUBLIC POLICY?
I enjoy watching the shameless media tryihng to kiss up to tiger now. If he was doing bad they would love to say that he is washed up. Success is the best revenge. That’s a tough one for Jesse to compete with. LOL!
Tiger lost big time. So what now? Boo hoo.
Just heard that Dixie Carter died yesterday. Dixie Carter and Hal Holbrook had such a great marriage. Tiger and Jesse should have taken notes from that lovely couple. May your soul rest in peace Dixie.
Welcome back Tiger.
Tiger is back at the top of his golf game and the reporters have no shame trying to get in his good books. Unbelievable!
Tiger rocks. If you men had the chance you would do the same thing. And if you skanky women had the chance you would do the same thing too. So enough of your stupid comments.
Allison, you may have to write another article, because Tiger has now taken back the torch back from Jesse (or Jesse happily handed it back). Tiger is now dominating the news with his new Nike commercial, which I think is brilliant strategy. Although I still think he is a louse for what he did to Elin.
The big problem is women still who feel they can fix any man if they only love them enough.
Let’s face it, men make decisions about sex based on their eyes, while women make decisions based on their hearts; both get screwed in the end.
Most people want to cheat at one time or another, except for asexual people. They don’t cheat only because they don’t have the opportunity or financial means to do so, or they are not attractive, have no $ and women don’t want to be bothered with them. Of course celebrity males have many more opportunities to cheat, compared to other men. BYW, women cheat at almost the same rate as men and that number is rising.